Best way to end dating

Yesterday morning I signed onto GChat and received the following message from a friend: “I officially got dumped by someone I wasn’t dating.” Whoo, boy.

Apparently, my friend had gone on two dates with a guy — fine dates! And then, out of nowhere, she gets a long, kindly-worded email from him explaining that things weren’t going to work out, but that she was “a nice girl,” etc etc.

One of the trickiest aspects of dating is how do you end it with someone you’ve only gone out with once or twice.

If you can't bring yourself to tell the truth and lie, make it a little vague and make it about your ex.

You know, the kind of email no one should have to be forced to read unless they’ve at least enjoyed some perks of an actual relationship.

Breaking up is hard to do — especially when you weren’t really dating in the first place.

Because any bar will do, unless it's so crowded that you have to shout.

It's like someone about to go into surgery, watching two doctors on have a soap-opera fight while standing over a person whose chest is cut open. It should be by whatever transportation you need to get home.


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